So Saturday I went to the grocery store for something I had forgotten. As happens everyone once in awhile, a box of Pop-Tarts caught my eye & whispered, "I taste really yummy...you want me." And so I bought them, put them in a sack, brought them home, & plopped the sack on the counter.
Later that night Tyson's friend came over to watch a basketball game. When I'd had enough of trying to work my word puzzles in spite of the squeaking shoes, crowd jeers, & inane repetitive crap spewing forth from the TV; I headed upstairs.
On the way up, I glanced at the table & saw my Pop-Tarts. Open. With only 2 packages in it.
Anyone with small children will identify with my next thought: "Who opened (and ate) MY Pop-Tarts?" I told Tyson that one of HIS children had eaten my special treat. (They are always HIS children when they are bad -- even though I have vivid memories of each birth)
The next morning, I asked Ty to go get me a Pop-Tart (before the kids eat them all). He came back & told me I was hallucinating. Not only were the Pop-Tarts all there, & in the pantry; they were unopened!
So now I have 2 realities to choose from: either I hallucinated the whole thing, or a hobo must live in my basement, ate my Pop-Tarts, didn't want to get caught, so went to the store (it is open 24 hours) while we slept & bought more.
I have to say I was leaning toward the second one.
Then I had an idea! What if Tyson's friend had brought over an open box of Pop-Tarts (for who knows why) & took them with him when he left? I told Tyson my brilliant alternative & declared that I would text his friend & ask. Ty replied with, "He's gonna think you're a lunatic."
But I texted anyway, & his friend answered yes. I was redeemed! I was not crazy! I even related the whole funny story to a friend at church while Tyson stood behind her shaking his head.
After church, Tyson & my own 3 innocent children started laughing at me. It turns out that his friend had NOT brought over the Pop-Tarts....Tyson had just texted him asking him to play along. And my kids knew about it!
So now I'm not just hallucinating. I'm gullible....and hallucinating. Yay. Go team.
4 comments:
Evil! I wonder, do any of your family remember (even slightly) how your three children entered this world? If they did, they would worship you and not blackmail you...They owe you dinner :)
That's funny - I have similar moments. I think that your kids ate the rest of the open box, and the box that Tyson found in the pantry was one that you already had. Did you check the garbage for wrappers?
Thanks for the solidarity Stacy.
Neisha - I wish that were the case, but I hardly ever buy them. And the second I do, they are gone. But I should try that theory out on Tyson and see if I can get him to stop laughing at me. :)
oh my goodness!
that is dirty!
we women have enough trouble keeping our sanity....
we really do not need any help going insane!!!
funny though!
love shell
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